It was ‘one of those days’. You know the ones. Exhaustion hung off me like humidity and the cloud around my brain seemed to move me in the direction of whatever didn’t really need doing, totally missing what was most important. It was a hazy, lazy, lethargic, static, sticky kind of day. I’d forgotten the shoes, showed up at the wrong time, left my keys behind and all such things that makes a person ask, how have I actually made it this far in life? Running behind to meet a friend who was picking me up a bus and sky
Love your Humanity
Suffering totally sucks. Watching people we love suffer, totally sucks. There is an obsession in our culture with doing well and being happy and it propels us into doing everything we can to not suffer. We make all sorts of plans and learn a whole bunch of information and practice skills so that we can make a fantastic life full of rainbows and butterflies and exquisite lovers and cold hard cash. Let’s outsmart suffering. Let’s outgrow suffering. Let’s out evolve suffering. Let’s do it better than our parents so we won’t suffer. Don’t let the irony be lost on you.
Do you know where you are right now? Silly question. Staring at a screen right? But your mind, your heart, the bulk of your focus. I can’t speak for everyone here, but I can speak for myself when I say that being fully present is difficult. Even being partially present really. I find a tremendous amount of comfort and excitement in fantasies of the future, in planning, in having a whole world that exists outside of right now that I am living into. I’ve always been urgent and even somewhat intense. (Those who know me well might get a chuckle
Compassion and condonation are not the same thing. Collapsing the two leads to idiot compassion. Idiot compassion is sourced from a desperation to do good. It is noble, but blind. It is dripping with altruism and perpetuates the problems that call for a compassionate view to begin with. Idiot compassion says “let it be. We are all the same. This behavior comes from ignorance. Love anyway.” Idiot compassion paralyzes. Allows for. Hides on the sidelines and nods. Idiot compassion is ignorance dressed in love’s clothing. Compassion says “Let it move. Be aware. This behavior comes from ignorance. Make a choice of right action. Love while doing
I own a variety of hats. Which is totally weird because I’m not really a ‘hat person’, but it seams that I have accidentally accumulated a bunch over time. I finally have a use for them. I was recently exploring this notion of role and the challenge that I face around moving from role to role with a sense of presence and grace. As I have been engaging in this predicament, I am seeing it everywhere with others that I work with and love, as one sees dogs everywhere after they get a new puppy. It is described to me
What big ol’ stack of beliefs do you have stored away about what it will take to have your work be what you want it to be? How many hours are not enough? How many are too much? How long should it take you to reply to an e-mail? a phone call? What are your standards for the work that you do? Is good enough, enough, just get it done and get the cheque? Or is perfection the expectation- vigilance the method? How do you see people and their role? They serve you? You serve them? You’re all one collective
A number of years ago I lived with a friend, a single mom, and her two year old daughter. Two year olds are awesome, my son is two now. They are funny and learning so much, everyday a new adventure for learning. One particular day, I learned a lesson from this two year old girl that has stuck with me. She was walking around with this bucket of balls. She would stop somewhere and pull them out and put them on the ground, arrange the colours and so forth and then put them back in the bucket and take them