These are the pressurized years, at a time in history, rolling out like a musty carpet full of lumps and glass. How to walk in a straight line, disoriented, terrifying, desperate. You’re sweetly committed to navigating the unknown as though your moment by moments are resting in wider trust. What you’ll come to know is that the tightness in your shoulders is from the grip of control. For you, control has always been about being a step ahead. A step ahead in understanding. A step ahead in compassion. A step ahead in whatever you think will make you good. As though being good or bright, generous or wise will give you a foothold. You’ll come to realize that being a step ahead was never what protected you from unravelling completely. It was always the hearts of others. It was always being able to land in the muck with your loves. Cold, dark clay on your skin, nothing sanitized, no distance. You will miss the contact of skin so hold your babies close, take hugs when you can. … [Read more...]
Inviting the Muse – Writing to the heart of motherhood
I remember the first time I said out loud that I wanted to be a writer. I was probably around 7 years old, standing between the living and dining room in our family home in East Vancouver with my toes curling over the edge of the red, wool carpet that had been my great grandfathers, and that’s now rolled up in the garage of my family’s home, floorless but I’m unable to let go. It was my grandmother I said it to and her delight filled me with joy, an early nod that I could pursue what I loved and be approved of by someone whose disapproval was palpable when it arose. The intertwining of the desires of free creative pursuit and approval are complicated and painful and writing is one medium to work that out, to unravel what’s seen and unseen. Some of the creative grief I feel comes from the privilege of being creatively successful. I have made a career of my craft. Writing, speaking, relating, coaching, leading. It’s all art to me and it’s truly a love. And...writing for my … [Read more...]
Coping in the Unknown
We’ve been getting a crash course in navigating the unknown. Like in a super macro way. No effing around, 2020 has us on the edge. The edge of our seats, the edge of our capacities, the edge of evolution. When you’re at your edge, what are the coping mechanisms that pop up first? Distracting or dissociating? The ol’ numb + soothe? Controlling yourself, others or your environment? Fits of fear or flight? Being able to be with uncertainty and navigate the unknown is a skill we can actually develop. But being able to regulate ourselves before our lizard brains take us right on the survival train takes some practice. Right about now, I’d consider it to be top-o-the-list. One night, pre-covid, I was playing the game Hot Seat with a dozen family members. The premise is when it’s your turn to be in the hot seat, you pick a card, share the question and everyone else anonymously submits an answer about you. You choose the winning answer. Points for people who know you well! My … [Read more...]
The “right” next business move. (Coaching for the Collective)
There’s A LOT of advice out there about how to grow and scale your business. If there’s one repeated pattern I’ve noticed with entrepreneurs when they’re at the stage of expanding from a one or two person show into building a team it’s a sense of confusion and overwhelm. What’s the “right way” and which advice should be taken? Meet Erin. She’s an entrepreneur who had to scale WAY BACK in terms of the time she could spend on her business. During the first few months of the pandemic, she and her husband moved, had no child care and she was left with only a small window here and there to devote to her business. Shockingly, not only did her business survive, it’s thriving! Join us as we explore the very cool position she finds herself in, discovering she has a model that runs itself, while also wanting to move into what’s next + hire the right people for smart and intentional growth. This session is one of those coaching/business jamming hybrids, which are pretty common in … [Read more...]
The juggle is real (Coaching for the Collective)
Time scarcity. What causes the experience that there’s not enough time? Is it simply factual, not enough hours for all the things? The responsibilities and commitments, even more intensified during particular seasons of life; the career, the family, all directions, pulling at time. Or is it possible that space, downtime, slower paces are too terrifying to inhabit? That when they seep in, busyness soothes us, so we fill them? This exploration and topic is my motha lovin’ jam. Meet Stephanie. She’s been in business for 14 years so she’s not new to the game of hustle and juggle. She’s established, ahead of the curve in her industry and has created a layered business model that is really taking something to take care of. Add a family to the pot, stir and bake at this pace for the next 20 years! What do we do then, if we’ve got that ‘what’s next’ feeling? You know that feeling? There’s something else calling to us. There are whispers of a new direction or way of … [Read more...]
Taking care of #1 (Coaching for the Collective)
In our more practical moments, perhaps we know that aspiring to “have it all” is unrealistic. And yet, the pursuit of a thriving career, achieving new levels of impact with our gifts, all while cultivating a rich family and community life...yes please. Do you find yourself stretched in all the directions, really wanting to trust that ‘you’ve got this’, but know that if just one more thing gets loaded on your plate, you’re effed? Meet Jeannine. Business owner, mother of two, expanding her capacity to meet the needs of her world while rocking her calling. I’ve worked with Jey one-on-one and she completed my last LEAD group coaching program. Many of the folks on Coaching for the Collective, I met for the first time when we both showed up on zoom. But Jey and I have been playing in this space for a long time together. This one was so powerful and so sweet. Tune in while we peel back layers, looking for the way to ensure she doesn’t abandon the emergent new projects when … [Read more...]
Monetize your creative gifts (Coaching for the Collective)
If you’re feeling ready to pivot into new territory with your gifts, we’ve got a juicy coaching session for you to bear witness to. If what you’ve pursued up until now has felt like you’ve been doing what you’re good at and even contributing in ways that are needed, but aren’t the true territory of your dharma, this session is for you! Meet Opal. She’s a writer and poet and is wondering if she can actually turn this love into a living. Wanting to move out of care work, she doesn’t fully trust the path because the form isn’t clear. How do you move forward with faith, trusting in the value you have to bring and your own Emergent Leadership, particularly when the form of your ‘what’s next’ is unknown? Tune in to find out. Hot tip with this session, we do some practice in the moment that you can follow along with and apply to yourself right away. Cool eh? Get ready to have ALL the permission to own your gifts, follow your dreams and get started, even if you’re foggy … [Read more...]
Is excellence your enemy?
For years, I found myself in the same pattern. I’d be pursuing a vision or goal, something right on the edge of a whole new territory of creativity, genius, and impact. I’d feel electric with possibility. Then I’d get sick. I’d pull back. Daunted and disheartened, I just wouldn’t have the energy for it. Especially the pieces that felt vulnerable, risky, hard. I assumed I’d just taken on too much. I first caught the pattern when I read The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks. One of the concepts he unpacks is what happens when we try to make the leap from our zone of excellence to our zone of genius. I’d read the book because several clients referenced it when hiring me to help them make that leap, I figured I should know what they were talking about. Moving from the zone of competence to the zone of excellence, well that just takes time, intention and hard work, yeah? But moving from excellence to genius...now you have something to lose. Your zone of excellence is, well, excellent. You … [Read more...]
Lighten the load (New Coaching for the Collective)
If you’ve never had this experience, I’ll be shocked… You have a vision for something you want to create. You care about it, deeply. You know it will make a difference. You know it’s yours to pursue. And then...you think about what it will take to actually make it happen and...rush of fear...it’s going to be so haaaaaard. We can absolutely be simultaneously inspired, fired up and ready to rock, while anticipating the grind ahead with heavy fear. So how to lighten the load? Especially when the work is in a territory that is charged, full of challenge and grit, like racial justice. Meet Holiday, anti-racism educator, meditation teacher and integral coach. She just completed Designing Impact, the first module of our upcoming LEAD program, which brings a special twist to this episode of Coaching for the Collective. Holiday generously brings forward her newly created Impact Statement and together we work it until she transforms the fear and heavy lifting into excitement and … [Read more...]
Overriding your instincts? Coaching for the Collective
Can you trust your instincts? Do you make decisions and lead your work and life from that which feels aligned with what you're called to do? Or do you find yourself overwhelmed by the noise, people pleasing or picking up what's not yours to carry? Meet Julia. When the pandemic struck, it became clear that the career she was embarking on wouldn't be possible in the near future. Inspiringly, she pivoted and started her own business! Now as she builds her body of work, she's looking to sharpen her instincts for alignment, to cut out the noise and advice of others. This episode of Coaching for the Collective is so tender as Julia discovers that actually, her instincts for right action are right on. There's something far more vulnerable thwarting her that I know so many people will resonate with. Tune in to find out. Thank you, Julia, for your fullhearted dive into this process! Would you love to join me for your own mini-coaching session on Coaching for the … [Read more...]
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